Space Quest IV: Shopping spree at the Galaxy Galleria

(This is part of my journey playing through Space Quest IV. You can follow the entire series on the Nostalgia Lane page.)

On the downside, Roger has been abandonded by his never-was wife and he has no pants.  On the upside, Roger’s at the funnest place in the universe with a stolen credit card. Let’s get shopping!

hz1A moving walkway takes Roger on a loop around the mall, which is pretty cool for getting your bearings.  This store, by the way, used to be “Radio Shock” in the original version (I’m playing the voice-enriched CD-ROM version).  Legal threats prompted the store name change.  I think it’s actually better, don’t you?

hz2First things first: Roger needs new threads.  He swings by the Big and Tall store, where a snooty robotic salesperson helps him with a new look.  Well, it’s actually the same old look, only with pants restored.  Whatever, at least now I’m less embarrassed to be seen with this guy.

hz3Oh hey look, it’s our old friend!  No, not this guy, I’ve never seen him before.  But the place is Monolith Burger, that greasy joint from Space Quest III.  And with that help wanted sign, it looks as though Roger’s fondest wishes are about to come true…

hz4It looks as though I’m in for another arcade sequence to earn some cash, but in a lovely twist, the game offers me a way to wimp out.  This warning disclaimer made my day.  The game gives me the cash and abruptly informs me that I’m about to be fired.  Then I’m fired.

My former boss of the past 20 seconds tosses his cigar butt down and a light bulb goes off in my head.  You see, I never played Space Quest IV, I know that, but this whole game is registering some major deja vu anyway.  I think I figured it out at this point: I probably read through some guide book or the official Space Quest Companion back when I was a kid.  I did that a lot, read manuals and walkthroughs.

Roger tries to use the ATM card, but the machine doesn’t think he looks anything like a girl.  Hm.  A girl, huh?  Is this one of those silly, contrived excuses to get dressed up in drag?  Oh, it is!

hz5Well, never let it be said that I pass up opportunities to cross-dress in video games.  The salesbot here mocks and belittles me for it, but hey, I look HOT.  I am totally pulling this off!

hz6They laughed when I wore that wig out of the store.  Well, who’s laughing now?  WHO’S LAUGHING NOW?  Me!  Me is laughing, with $2,001 stolen Buckazoids!

hz7Flush with funds, Roger goes next door to Software Excess, which has been wiped out except for a bargain bin.  It looks as though there are a few parody titles in here, including Boom (Loom), Cluck Egger’s Advanced Chicken Simulator (Chuck Yeager’s Advanced Flight Simulator) and Sim Sim (Sim City).  Oh, and there’s a Space Quest IV hint book!  Huh.  That *could* come in handy.  Yoink!

hz8I’ve been trying to get that stupid dog in the basket since minute one of this game!  I must have this book.

hz9This is pretty hilarious for all-new reasons.  12 gigabytes must have sounded HUGE back in the early 90s.  Now it’s a small MMO.  Also, did they screw up the Roman numerals there or am I dreaming?

So are you wondering what the hint book says?  Well, tune in tomorrow!

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One thought on “Space Quest IV: Shopping spree at the Galaxy Galleria

  1. Yes, they did screw up the Roman numerals – should be XLVIII.

    5 years of studying Latin (and 3 of Ancient Greek) are finally vindicated.

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