There. With those two words, some select members of the Bio Break reading audience are now screaming with raw fury, crying like babies, and screaming invectives of the like an R-rated movie has never seen. It’s not their fault. They’ve just been up against one of the more frustrating additions to Guild Wars 2’s new Belcher’s Bluff minigame.
As I said previously, I’ve enjoyed the beefing up of the achievement system (even if I don’t quite understand why the reward chests are so PvP-centric… no, I do not want another set of gear I’ll never use. Why not give me a mini instead?). It’s allowing me to pick and choose my goals, and last week I made it my mission to get the Grandmaster of Om in the new Belcher’s Bluff. Since the final boss for this achievement’s only going to be around for another week or so, I figured it would be a good time to do so.
So Belcher’s Bluff… it’s kind of a fun little game, all things considered. It’s a strategy game where you’re trying to drink your opponent under the table by not drinking while they do drink. You’ve only got a handful of moves and the choice of a special skill. The latter are only obtained by beating certain NPCs in the game, so like Mega Man, you’re acquiring their powers.
Each of the bosses leading up to the last one have their own special moves, so it takes some adjustment of strategy. None are too difficult… until you get to Adnul Irongut.
This is the brick wall against I slammed my head time and time and again over the weekend. I’d log in, play against him as long as I could stand his obnoxious condescending tone and abuse of his special moves, then log out and do my calming mantra (“it’s only a game… it’s only a game…”). He’s absolutely infuriating. His special move is really tough, he’s got tons of health, and like all of the bosses, he can spam his special while you only get to use yours once. Why? Because, that’s why. ArenaNet is the parent and we are the kids and we don’t get to ask why.
Yes, I finally beat him and in retrospect it’s kind of amusing to look back at all of the many, many forum threads and Twitter messages whining about this guy. The general consensus is that he’s way too difficult for what should be a fun minigame, and since you got to get through him to get to the last boss and the achievement, he’s not optional once you begin down that path. There are a lot of cries for ArenaNet to nerf him, and nerf they did… not to Irongut, oh no, but to the player workaround of using food buffs to help regenerate health. Yeah, those are gone now.
There are a few strategies to beating him, although all of the ones I read said the same thing: You can follow this strategy, but even so, you’ll probably lose. Winning comes down to luck. And I can personally verify that this is the case.
Anyway, it was nice to wipe the floor with him, take on the last boss, and be deemed Grandmaster. I guess it was too much to ask for an actual title to go with that, tho? Guild Wars 2 is really stingy with its titles, I’ve found. I think a title and an “I wiped the floor with Irongut” t-shirt would be appropriate.