(This is part of my journey going checking out Quest for Glory III: Wages of War. You can follow the entire series on the Retro Gaming page.)
I’m not going to lie — the Simbani village is Dullsville and I have travel fever. My feet must hit the road! It actually took me a little while to figure out how to leave the village, because when you go through the front gate you end up with Mr. Lookout up there. Turns out you have to keep walking past him to get to the world map.
So I am not a fan of Quest for Glory III’s world map. It’s this giant, two-screen sprawl that doesn’t label anything. You’re expected to squint at all of the jagged little pixels and try to find landmarks representing explorable areas. Shoot, forget that — I’m downloading an annotated map. This is 2016 and nobody has to put up with shoddy map design!
What’s just background detail and what’s important stuff? I don’t know. Where is my character? Have fun finding him in the picture above. It’s the teeny-tiny yellow dot to the right of the pool of water. I know VGA was hot new stuff back then, but just because you can make things microscopic doesn’t mean you should.
Hey look at that, my first fight! Against… a giant ant-thing? I guess? You’ll be happy to know that I win, and I’m happy that my sword did indeed light up with the blue flames of righteous justice. PALADIN LIFE YO!
Here’s a nice spot: A refreshing pool that’s got free water, free rest, and a free cheetah pervert who hangs out on a rock, breathing heavily as you take a nap. The game even makes a point of saying that it reminds you of Erana’s Peace from the first game — kind of a save haven that is perfect to recharge stats, rest, and fill one’s waterskins.
Another interesting location is a little area where some meerbats are doing fly-bys on some poisonous thrashing plants. One little guy gets captured, and so — being the fine, upstanding Paladin that I am — I whip a throwing knife at the plant and save the little fellow. He repays me by leaving out an opal and some fruit for me.
Aw… I was hoping that he’d owe me a life debt and come along as my traveling companion.
I needed a good groaner, and I certainly got one. A bird leads me to a tree swarming with killer bees. The description above — if read out loud — is “You see de bees.” Ugh. Who hurt you when you were a kid, game? Who made you like this?
It’s not just enough that the game killed me. The game had to pile on some awful puns to make my defeat even worse.
The fighting is just not that fun at all. It’s hard to tell when to strike — sometimes I hit, sometimes I don’t, but it’s never very consistent in terms of hitting when the monster animation is in a certain place. And I’m starting to dread these random savannah encounters, which make getting from point A to point B (slowly) an extra chore.
Time to head back to the village for a bit. There I meet the Storyteller, who doesn’t so much tell interesting tales as he recounts what’s actually happening (or recently happened) without naming the people involved. One such account has to do with Uhura and why she left the village to have her kid (because she wouldn’t be considered a warrior if she had stayed and had him there).
Another interesting revelation is that the chief admits that the tribe is in possession of the Leopardmen’s drum — the alleged source of their magic. So you’re all twisted up that they stole your spear but you have their drum? You little hypocrite you.