I honestly thought I was done with The Secret World. That’s because Funcom up and stopped developing for the game, all but abandoning it over the last year. Case in point, the last time I blogged about playing it, the date was August 2018 — and that’s because I had just finished up South Africa, the most recent content update for the game. 2019 came and went without much of anything, so I figured Funcom had given up. And it might have, but here’s something quite fortuitous for Valentine’s Day: A special, new investigation mission.
So yeah, sure, I’ll come back to see it.
The fun — such as it is — begins in the April Fools pocket dimension of Tabula Rasa. Here sits a weirdly sparking Soulmate arcade cabinet, which pairs me with another player. I thought we’d have to go somewhere together and cuddle, but no, it meant we needed to don some boxing gloves and smack the crap out of each other until one of us won.
I won. Bully for me.
It’s not the most intricate of investigation missions, but from where I’m sitting, it seems to involve the anonymous faction known as The Swarm (aka the anti-bees who dress up like wasps). From what I remember of two years ago, the game only started to tease the Swarm as a new wrinkle in the whole Secret World. I think they want to recruit me, and if so, I’m all up for that.
The mission tasks me with tracking one of the members of the Swarm, a purple-haired girl who is annoying adept at throwing all sorts of obstacles in my path as we weave and bob around London. After one failed attempt, I finally tracked her down to a portal and we had it out in a tepid fight (thanks, story mode). She narrowly escaped but Isabel — the daughter of Tabula Rasa’s owner — dropped her phone with some incriminating contacts and emails.
I like that, once again, the mission ends on a choice to help out the Swarm (wipe the phone) or obey my faction (send the info to the Templars). I’ll all pro-Swarm, assuming that this storyline ever actually continues, so I wiped it.
Thanks for the half-hour diversion, Secret World. See you again in two years?